2018 it’s been real.

Hello my rebels and not so rebels,

It’s been a few weeks so first let me start by saying

Merry Christchristmahanakwanzika! (there’s a lot of holidays in there)

This holiday season was quite different than any one in the past as it was spent at the hospital and praying that my mother would be home in time for Christmas and by the Grace of God she made it home just in time to have Christmas dinner with the family. A true Christmas miracle.

As I write this post, pretty soon we’ll all be saying Happy New Year!

Somehow this year has completely flown by and we are officially at the end of 2018. Let me just say, What a year?!

Good riddance 2018… please pack your bags you’re no longer welcome here. lol

Seriously, am I the only one who feels like 2018 was such a TRYING year?

From the beginning to end… 2018 came up and showed its ass. lol

Go away already!

There’s no way you’re ending 2018 the same way you started and that alone is a blessing. Think of all of the growth and life you lived to make it to today. My year started off with so much change that I literally didn’t even pay attention to the months passing by, I simply took life day by day.

A few years ago I believed that before you went into a new year you needed to have a plan for what was to come for the following year, the following month, heck even the following day. What I’m learning as 2018 comes to a close is that yeah a plan is a good guide to how you might want to live your life but ultimately God doesn’t work with plans, at least not yours. He has His own plans so the only option you have is to make the best of EACH and every day.

In a lot of ways I let 2018 get the best of me, yes growth occurred but I also held myself back scared to get hurt, scare to build new realtionships, new habits, new routines, scared to simply say yes rather than so many no’s. Many times I let myself feel defeated, I allowed myself to throw little pity parties, I had more struggle moments than I had expected to have in my life at this age. Honestly, as I sit here and think about it I’m thankful for the struggles because for the first time in a while I recognized my patterns and was able to get in front of the hard times and deal with them head on although none of it has been easy.

2018 reminded me to make more memories, create more moments for my kids and I. They are getting older and although the financial struggle may be real sometimes, I realized that it’s time to start living life a little bit more and have more fun.

In my birthday post I mentioned how I kept seeing this quote,

“You don’t need to give your kids a perfect mom,

you need to give them a happy mom.”

that quote is going to be one of my mottos for 2019.

I have a few goals this new year…

  1. Focus on bettering my mental and physical health – do yoga, walks in the park, walks at the beach, more meditation.
  2. Remind myself that consistency is key.
  3. Be more present, in life, in family, in church.
  4. Find another stream of income or 2 or 3 or 4. lol I’m about to be on my Cardi B, Money moves
  5. Spend time with my friends more!
  6. Be open. Open Mind, Open Heart.

I’m excited for the evolvment and growth to come in 2019.

I will end this post with this…

2018,

Thank you for the good times, thank you for the bad, thank you for the lessons and bumps in the road and thank you for all the smiles.

Thank you for reminding me what it feels like to live this life for my babies and I. Thank you for helping me stand on my own two feet when I thought I couldn’t.

Thank you for showing me who is there for me, who is for me and simply who isn’t. Thank you for reintroducing me to God. Thank you for reminding me that without HIM there is no me and without Jesus there is no way I could live the life I have now.

Thank you for reminding me who my support system is. Thank you for the new experiences, new friendships, renewed way of thinking.

You were good, but now it’s time to be GREAT.

Goodbye 2018, Hello 2019!

Signed with tons of love & light,

V

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